Here's my story about the absolute slowest player I've ever seen.

Seat 9 (next to the dealer) opens up at my table. This guy is sent over to us. The dealer asks him if he'd like to play the big blind or come in behind the button. In response, he asks if he has to play at this particular table. "Yes, this is table 15. Do you want to play the blind?" He says some other non-responsive stuff, so she just deals him out.

Meanwhile, the chip runner comes over so this guy buys his chips. This is a $3-$6 game. He buys a $100 rack and then asks if he can buy any more. How many racks would he like? Five. The chip runner looks a bit amused, and goes to get more chips. He comes back with five racks, but the guy settled for just buying two racks.

When he's finally dealt in behind the button and it's his turn to act, he says "raise" and throws a handful of chips in the pot -- probably 10 or 12. Then he throws another handful in. (He hasn't looked at his cards yet.) The dealer explains that he can only raise to six. "Okay," he says, and throws six more chips in the pot.

He does the same thing the next two or three times the action is on him. He doesn't seem to understand that it's 3-6 dollars, not 3-6 handfuls.

It took this guy about two or three minutes per turn to get done with all his nonsense. Several times, he just wouldn't answer at all when he was asked if he wanted to fold/call/raise. He'd just tell the dealer, "you decide for me." Or, "I'll call, but you take the correct number of chips for me." The dealer isn't allowed to touch his stack, so that held things up for a while as well since he refused to touch his cards or his chips himself.

He got kicked out of the casino after three hands.

He was definitely on something, but nobody could tell what. It wasn't alcohol. Whatever it was, I don't think I want any.